Marriage for Today and Tomorrow

A recent Mother' Union workshop considered ways in which Christians can promote marriage in the 21st century and support couples in all kinds of relationships.

Introducing the evening the Rt Revd Alan Wilson, Bishop of Buckingham, said that although society now sends out conflicting signals about marriage, people are still attracted by a romantic notion of stable, faithful relationships through marriage, even though this is often not the reality.

After discussing their experiences of relationships, successful and frustrating, participants Participants enjoyed a plenary discussion led by a panel including Bishop Alan and his wife Lucy, who are a presenting couple for ‘Engaged Encounter’, Kate McTear from the Aquila Care Trust, Liz Percival from  Students Exploring Marriage  (SEM) Trust and ‘2-in-2-1’, the Revd Jeremy Trigg of the Diocesan Flame group and the Revd Lady Brown, Prayer and Spirituality Co-ordinator for MU in the Diocese.

As well as a variety of very valuable marriage preparation resources available in some parishes it was agreed that providing a listening ear and ongoing mentoring after marriage is important, as many couples today do not have local family support.

Effective ways to reach non-churchgoers were also discussed, including ways to support those planning civil ceremonies. The most important message was the need for a change of culture within the church to counteract the impression that Christian marriages are always perfect and the church has nothing to say to those whose relationships have failed. There is a need for honesty, for sharing both good and bad experiences, and to demonstrate that forgiveness and reconciliation can heal the most broken relationships. If we can work towards such a change it may encourage more couples to see the church as as understanding of their problems.