Monday 26th March 2007
‘If I'm afraid of something, I do it'. That's Madonna's philosophy. It is an enviable 'rule for living' to those of us who habitually structure our lives to avoid what we fear. It's also a poignant message for Easter.
'What should I say, “Father save me from this hour?” No, it is for this reason that I have come to this hour.' These words of Jesus as he approached his Passion reveal the painful ambivalence with which he faced down the terrifying ordeal of physical torture and death. I'm sure it wasn't the first time he'd been afraid, but it was probably the most acute.
In his now famous inauguration speech in 1994 Nelson Mandela said, 'Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us…We were meant to shine as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God within us. It is not just in some of us, it is in everyone….'
Most of us live most immediately with the spectre of the things we can't do. This is the territory that we rule 'out of bounds' to ourselves for fear of failure. We stick to doing the things we can do, and do them to the best of our ability, in order to maintain our self-esteem and keep going.
Mandela knew that self-esteem and pride in self-identity had been systematically undermined in a whole generation of his people. Rebuilding a just and equal society after apartheid wasn't (and isn't) just about ensuring equal services for all, but about facilitating a regeneration of self-worth amongst millions of people who, from birth, had received the message, 'you are nothing'.
There are communities in every nation, including our own, that have become imbued with a similarly denigrated sense of self, through a myriad of interconnecting forces. Mandela knew that personal and social change would come through telling new and creative stories to replace the destructive old ones, and from 'living as though' things were different and the kingdom of self-belief had already come.
We become who we are not simply through facing down the big life-and-death fears, but also incrementally by engaging with the smaller ones. Every time we do something for the first time it's difficult and scary, but deep down we know that growth comes through feeling the fear and doing it anyway. These are the small steps towards becoming who we were created to be.
Have a scary Easter.
Alison Webster is the Social Responsibility Adviser for Oxford Diocese