The woman who said ‘no’ to the Kray twins

Mary began her life long interest in youth work at Reading Girls Youth Club in Chain Street. A friend of Mary’s suggested that she should take a three-year training course in East London. Before long, though, war was declared and Mary, while maintaining her youth work interest, concentrated on helping to run three community halls. Thus Mary continued through the early years of the war, often spending nights with her charges under the protective shelter of London Bridge!

With the cessation of the Blitz, Mary was able to resume her youth work fully; she expressed a wish now to work with mixed sex groups and became leader of the SPY Club, a name chosen because of war time restrictions on mentioning place names. SPY Club was the South Poplar Youth Club. It was here that Mary had to turn away twin lads because they kept trying to attend even though living outside the catchment. They subsequently achieved notoriety as the Kray Twins!

Mary was deeply involved with All Saints, Poplar, and under the Revd Hodson (later Bishop of Hereford), she became a deacon. It was while Mary was attending a daily service with fellow church workers that the church was hit by a V2. They were saved because the debris from the roof fell onto the overhanging balcony beneath which they were seated!

After twenty years of service to the East End communities family responsibilities brought Mary back to Reading in 1958 to nurse her mother. It was not long, however, before Mary was in demand again, this time by the Bishop of Oxford. He appointed her Bishop’s Adviser for Lay Ministry, and was one of just three deacons appointed to serve the whole of the diocese – 500 parishes! He suggested she be ordained but Mary considered that, in a world less receptive to women priests than now, this step could prove an impediment to her vocation with families and young people. By the time she retired aged 70, Mary had witnessed the increase of the female diaconate to over 70, an expansion due in no small part, no doubt, to her own efforts. (One should add that during this time Mary worked only for expenses and, not being a car driver, travelled everywhere by public transport).

Subsequently Mary sold the family home in Eastern Avenue, with its memories of her brother and mother, to take well-deserved retirement in a local residential home.

Here she died peacefully on 17th September 2004 after several years of incapacity bravely borne. I am sure that all who visited Mary during that, or any other  time came away feeling a better person!

Thank you, Mary.

John Starr

A longer version of this article first appeared in Reading St. Luke's parish magazine